Shay 7 going on 16

This post is about my daughter, because as much as I love her. She's making me crazy right now. I love that she is way more social than I ever was. She loves her friends!! She is kind to people and cares about their feelings which is all good. But, lately the friend thing is driving me crazy. She loves to have friends over after school, which is fine too. The problem is is when they are over they just dont seem to listen to me, especially my daughter. They love to go upstairs and listen to music. Mainly High School Musical (the newest fad). Shay got in trouble everyday for a week for talking. So I told her that she couldnt play if I heard from her teacher that she wasnt doing the right thing. So she straightened that up and now only gets in trouble on Tuesdays. The day that she goes to dance and can't play with friends anyway. Hmmmm! I guess I should be happy that she's no dummy. Yesterday, I heard the music loud in my room and went to check on my daughter and her friends. She was lifting her leg on to the railing of our balcony. I did what every good mother does and screamed at her and asked her "What the heck are you doing?(yes Im kidding here) Instead of explaining why it was dangerous to put your leg over the balcony on the second floor. Derek says I treat her different then him and let her get away with more stuff. I think he's right. I want to tell him that if he were a little quieter about his naughtiness, he would get away with more stuff also. But I'm sure he'll figure this out all on his own someday. Help!